Sex with a White man? Different? Noo…

There was an interesting topic of conversation among some of my friends on Facebook yesterday. 

What was it you ask? 

What is sex like with a White man as opposed to a Black man? 

Oh yeah? Now you all know as an angry mixed lady, I couldn’t leave this one alone. Please forgive me if this post offends anyone….just kidding! If you can’t take it then go put on your big kid panties and keep it moving! My own personal experience has been hearing Black women say things like, “I just can’t do it…they’re too small…” or things like, “I can’t see myself with a “pink” penis…” 

What in the entire hell are you TALKING about? How can you actually sit back and say with confidence that a White man’s penis is too small if in fact you’ve never allowed yourself to experience this for yourself? It literally makes me sick to hear such comments from women. Either way, my experience thus far is that of epic proportions. Currently I am seeing a man defined as being Caucasian. He is Italian, but by definition is White. Is he lacking in the personal area? Absolutely not! Matter of fact, I’d say he’s FAR better than any past escapade. His body is on point and he aims to please. Not just himself of course, but me. It’s never a rushed thing…never. Passionate and sensual and just generally amazing. 

Since meeting him and being with him intimately I will say I wholly prefer him over all else. Ladies before you jump on the “I don’t sleep with White men because their penis is small” train, do a little research and experiment a little. I am telling you….because I have known a couple of teeny peened Black men in my lifetime who would *never* have the opportunity to have any intimate parts of me again. 

[maybe one day.]

Maybe one day it’ll all happen for me; I’ll be dressed up in a flowing white dress being walked down the aisle by my Daddy.

Maybe one day I’ll be able to go through the painstaking process of planning a day that I’ll hold close to my heart for all eternity; a day that no one will ever forget.

Tomorrow I turn thirty. I haven’t accomplished a tenth of the things I had hoped I would by this age. I do have my beautiful daughter, but I don’t have that solid companionship. My daughter of course means the world to me, but lets face it, no one wants to live life alone or die alone.

Maybe one day a man will find me who will undoubtedly appreciate everything about me, my faults, my generosity, my love…..

me.

You see the problem lies therein. I seem to attract the man who of course is a good looking man, but typically a misogynistic cheater who loves me to a degree. A man who loves me because he might feel like he HAS to because of the good I’ve done in his life.

And here’s where I make my mistake, I love them. I love them with 100% of me.

Loving someone shouldn’t be emotionally draining nor should it be that trust is having to be rebuilt due to lapses in judgments and mistakes made.

To all of my exes: one day you’ll look back and see just how much of a keeper I really am. By then, it’ll be too late.

That said, one day I’ll be romantically proposed to because there is someone out there who genuinely will want to spend his whole life with me…and only

ME.

..I’m sorry you did what?!

Hi there folks! I’m on a whole different page today for some reason…not sure why but it is what it is. Partial discussion for today: changing a taken man.

Ladies, if you meet him, start dating him while he is involved with someone, there’s no way in hell he’s going to leave her and actually be faithful to you. Sorry…I do not believe it. It doesn’t matter the situation, if he’s cheating on her with you what makes you think you’re so special that he’s going to stop just for you? Did you forget you were the side chick for a moment? Yeah, that’s what I thought. Now if there’s someone out there (preferably a male) who can seriously back up the claim that a man can change and be faithful to a woman that he met while being unfaithful…(I’m not talking about a married man…that’s a whole ‘nother topic! I’m more specifically speaking of a man who is actively dating another woman…), then please, by all means do inform me of one of these cases for I’ve NEVER heard of it happening.

Ladies, do you think you have some magical vagina juice that will somehow convince him to stay with you? I hate to break it to you, but his girl also probably thought she had the magic stuff too and could keep her man satisfied. Clearly that didn’t work out too well for her either? We’ve got to for sure do more better. Yes, I said MORE BETTER.

On another note, I have a huge problem with the demoralization of nudity. Only here in America do we see nudity and automatically switch gears to making it something sexual. Get outta here…

We were born in our birthday suits which clearly consisted of nothing but our beautiful skin and whatever else we might have be it we were born male or female. So why is it such a bad thing to be naked? I personally ENJOY being naked and just walking around naked. It matters not how unattractive one may think I look when I am in my full birthday suit, it makes me feel great. As should you too. In my humble opinion, I believe women especially should walk around naked, and look at themselves in the mirror in this state. The reason behind this: confidence. How many of you ladies dread walking in front of that full length mirror right after you’ve showered and dried off because of the image peering back at you? I am sure there are a good many of you who are almost disgusted with the image in the mirror; a distorted silhouette of your former teenage self. You should EMBRACE who you are now! Stop turning the lights off when you’re making love with your man (or woman whichever you prefer) leave the lights on! He or she will enjoy the new found confidence you have! I promise….that in itself will make for a more exciting romp in the sheets I guarantee. Walk around naked, touch your body, dance for yourself, do whatever it takes for you to love who YOU are!

Nudity is beautiful!

september 21 2013.

In the wake of the impending end of the world this Friday, I felt it only to be appropriate to share my thoughts of this Mayan catatsrophe. First of all, what if the world does not in fact end on Friday, December 21st, 2012? Will I still get paid for my time put in for the past month? Will I seriously miss Christmas and the opportunity to get back in school next semester?

More importantly, does that mean I’ll miss my opportunity to procreate again. I won’t be able to make love to the man of my dreams, my future husband and bring into the world nine months later a beautiful baby. A baby conceived on the night the world was supposed to end.

Now if indeed the world does not end, we are going to see a serious influx of child support cases being opened and a second coming of a masssive baby boom.

I just know that dammit if it’s going to end, I had better be with some super cool people and all of that good stuff…

It also won’t hurt to practice that reproduction just one more time before the world ends according to the Mayan calendar…:-)

{Extreme dislike: personified.}

Theoretically speaking, we never dated. Seriously at least. I’d say we casually dated with some seriousness thrown in the mix during those few months of the dance we were doing. It was a very nice dance when we were both in sync. A dance of epic proportion; a dance that seemed to flow together much like the pieces of a complicated puzzle where the two of us where the winning shapes.

I guess I can’t really be mad that you lied to me…

Right?

You see, more than anything I was affected by you in a way that no one else has done before. You looked me in the eye and said in a nutshell I was much like the woman you indeed were looking for. You tore yourself into the windows of my soul, spoke sweet words of desire and truth by your definition into my ear…and I took them in. I listened and believed every single word you spoke to me that night. I soaked every one of your words in and kept them locked away in the back of my mind by lock and key, with you being the one who held the master-key. In such a short period of time, my emotions were overwhelmed by a sense of desire to know more about you. A desire to reel you in and just hold you. Hold you and pray that you’d allow me to one day learn to love you.

Little did I know at the time, but your words were made of nothing. Nothingness and dark intentions filled these words rather than good intentions mentioned in your silky words spoken. The words spoken to me by you rolled off your tongue with such ease and deception, I should’ve saw clear through it from the beginning. But me being a trusting woman, a woman who wanted so badly to believe you might be indeed different from the vast majority of penises out there seeking to just bust a nut and keep it moving. But of course, I was tragically wrong.

I oftentimes question the length of time required to fall for someone per se, and unfortunately I don’t think it took that long for me to fall for you. You’re not the absolute most beautiful man I’ve ever dealt with so truthfully it’s not even the looks. (I’m not a bad looking lady so I can pull my weight in the sexy man department…please believe that…) It was your personality. It was the way our personalities jived, the common interest and the ability to carry on a real conversation with you without having to fill in gaps and voids with nonsensical information.

It was the ability to stand there with your arms wrapped all around me for a long period of time and not one word be verbally spoken yet so many words said at one time. Sometimes it’s what is NOT said that means so much more than words that are verbally spoken and at that moment, your non verbal communication spoke volumes of intimacy and belief in something greater between you and I.

But that was only a product of deception and lies to fill a personal void that obviously you have and I cannot fix. I congratulate you on your endeavors. You should also win some kind of an award for your amazing acting skills because you definitely played a great role and won me over without saying one word….

Do not let the attractive face fool you.

Ladies and gentlemen. My brothers and sisters. You all have got to stop this foolishness.

A topic rarely visited by our minority community is protection against sexually transmitted diseases. Now, I am targeting the minority community because based on statistics, this is where the most issue lies. (http://www.cdc.gov/std/stats10/minorities.htm statistics do not lie people)

Blacks—In 2010, the overall rate among blacks in the United States was 1,167.5 cases per 100,000, a 4.0% increase from the 2009 rate of 1,122.2 cases per 100,000. The rate of chlamydia among black women was over seven times the rate among white women (1,536.5 and 205.1 per 100,000 women, respectively) (Figure O). The chlamydia rate among black men was almost 11 times the rate among white men (761.8 and 69.9 cases per 100,000 men, respectively).

Just because you see an attractive woman or an attractive man, that does not mean you dive in unprotected. What people do not realize is that these diseases can lay dormant for years and not come to fruition until years later. Now, just because a person has contracted something, doesn’t mean he or she was or is promiscuous. One cannot control what their significant other, girlfriend, boyfriend, fiancée, husband or wife do outside of a monogamous relationship. This is where it is more imperative now than ever to be protected and to stay faithful if you are in a relationship with someone. ANYONE is at risk, even those of you who have stayed faithful and may have only had ONE partner in life. Even those who kept their virginity until marriage. You can only account for what your husband/wife has told you.

Don’t judge a person who might’ve had something once before that has been cured. You don’t know the circumstances surrounding the contraction because remember, it only takes ONE person to be unfaithful to pass it to their partner unknowingly. Or it only takes one person that you trusted to be honest to give you an STD without any fair warning. Remember, they might not have known themselves.

Do not get offended if your partner asks to be tested together; it’s for both of your protection and not making any implications that one or the other has cheated. We need to get REAL about this serious topic and stop living in a fantasy world that it could “never happen to me”.

In closing, don’t let the attractive face fool you. I read way too many sad stories of lives being ruined from one night of instant gratification…