Dude, we’re married but don’t start catching feelings…

So there’s this guy, he’s this woman’s husband. They’re married….

He has a girlfriend, she has two boyfriends but the husband is now catching feelings. Poor wife is now about to be the other woman in her own marriage. Is it in fact possible to be the other woman in your own marriage?

Yes, most definitely.

I find this story to be quite hilarious in all regards because there are three men here one is married to this lovely lady and the other two are boyfriends.

Well, sort of.

To hear the story of all of the confusion is that of a great work of fiction. A typical daytime soap opera with all of the cheesy lines and jealous pickups and a triangle of love. You see, the wife doesn’t love her husband. She’s just married to him. However this is where the dilemma is coming into play; he is starting to fall for his wife and is refusing to sign the divorce papers.

She doesn’t want you. She’s only married to you!

So technically, if in fact he sleeps with his wife does that mean he cheated on his mistress?

I should have known. Take Heed.

What is it with you men? And women.

If you know he or she is isn’t a great person, why do you give him or her the time of day?

No, it isn’t because of desperation. No, it isn’t because of low self esteem (although if you stay in it long enough, you will inevitably develop the disease of LSE, Low Self Esteem)

It is because you have chosen to love the unlovable. You have made the active decision to put your own feelings aside and do whatever necessary to milk that other person back to health, despite your own short comings. You decided to be the person who everyone looks down upon as if you have done something wrong.

All because you chose to love an unlovable.

Even the unlovable deserve to be loved; maybe at a distance? I have been guilty of loving the unlovable because I am, by nature, a nurturer. But who nurtures the nurturer when they need to be nurtured?

No one. The unlovable that the nurturer has devoted their entire being to is nowhere to be found. The unlovable proves exactly why so many people steer away and elect to not love the unlovable.

Still, many like me continue to love and have faith in that person. We always hope for the best and despite all of the problems that may have come from loving the unlovable, we still wish for the unlovable to be part of our lives. Because as stated before, we love those who others just do not have the patience to love unconditionally.

The hardest part of loving such a person is the fact that at any given point, we as the lovers of these folks will inevitably lose ourselves. We become so engulfed with their very existence of trying to mold them into the person we know they can be and will be, we lose who WE are.

Add in there molding and sculpting the unlovable into a person worthy of acceptance by most everyone else to only have that person leave. You worked so hard to help better that person and they just leave.


But that’s okay. It’s not YOU. You must understand that despite, the takeaway is that you aided in making someone else a better person in some regard. That is what we are supposed to do right? Be selfless. Love others. Be kind. Do good things and good things come back to you.

Yes. Those things are true.

But no one explained how difficult the outcome will be for the person who selflessly gave to make the other person a better person. No one mentioned that it is indeed a lie that always doing good things for others will bring good things to you.

Do not fall for it.

It is a lie.

Constantly doing good for those who need it the most are the very ones who will bring you out of character if you are there for too long hoping, wishing and helping. The good you are doing will eventually suck you dry of all emotions and hope. Never being on the receiving end of good doings will make you a very sad bitter person. You will resent the person that you once loved so dearly and resent the person who gets to enjoy the fruits of your hard labor.

No, it isn’t fair.

And yes, Karma is real.

Let her do her magic and stop being so good to people….