I never tried to change you.
My intentions were not to change you, but to maybe attempt to fulfill something that was obviously missing in your life.
Love. I don’t mean lust, I mean love. A real love. We were an unconventional pair; a duo that wasn’t supposed to happen according to life’s standards. For a very long time we defied the odds. We were happy.
Or maybe *I* was delusional. I knew your history but chose to put that behind as we all have some kind of a history as a human being. I chose not to dwell on the past and move forward with the future. I made the conscious decision to trust you. To believe in you…to believe in us. A fairy tale that seemingly headed in the right direction until reality hit.
Reality hit that you are a user. You are a user of all sorts. You are a user of things and people. You sucked the life out of me towards the end. You’ve made me feel like a complete and utter failure. You took my heart and threw it in a blender, turned it on high and added the turbo power for the extra boost of cruelty.
You are heartless and only about your own self gratification. I played into it and believed every stupid word you said. I never wish any ill will on anyone, however I hope you the best of luck in your future endeavors. Because clearly I am not the person that you need or who you want.
I loved the shit out of you…I loved everything about you.
I am beginning to despise you. Men like you are the reason why women have trust issues…even in the event of pushing aside whatever you might’ve done in your past as I have a past too.
With that I throw the middle finger in the air and proudly say FUCK YOU. Fuck you for making me believe you actually loved me. For making me believe you gave a damn about me and my well being.